Tag Archives: funeral

The “Aid in Dying” movement – is it a good idea?

According to an article that appeared a few days ago in the New York Times,  there is a new movement in the United States called “Aid in Dying”.  It’s supporters try to avoid calling it what it really is – assisted suicide – but, whatever they call it, it’s gaining traction.   

Until 2008, assisted suicide was legal in just one state: Oregon.  Today, it’s legal in five states: Montana, Oregon, Washington, Vermont and New Mexico.  Supporters of the right for a terminally ill patient to choose aid in dying are supporting “death with dignity” bills in Connecticut and other states. 

Lawsuits in New Mexico and Montana related to this topic have resulted in a differentiation between aid in dying, which is now legal, and assisted suicide, which is still considered a crime in both of those states. 

Church groups have weighed in on the topic and claim that aid in dying is morally wrong.  However, more and more people are asking for the right to die on their own terms according to Barbara Coombs Lee, president of Compassion & Choices.  

In May 2013, a Gallup Poll was conducted.  It asked whether doctors should be allowed to “end the patient’s life by some painless means” when patients and their families want it.  70% said yes.  However, when asked whether doctors should be allowed to help a dying patient “commit suicide”, only 51% said they should.  It’s clear that the exact wording is critically important in assessing how people really feel about the issue and on what is actually legal. 

What do you think?  Should aid in dying be made legal in your state?

To learn more about other topics related to death, go to www.diesmart.com.

Have you thought about an at-home funeral?

Until the end of the 19th century, when someone died, it was the norm to keep the body at home where the family would take care of the deceased loved one until his or her burial.  But as the funeral home industry grew, the number of at-home funerals declined and didn’t regain popularity until about ten years ago.

A story from WBUR, Boston’s NPR station, discusses the recent interest in this type of funeral and cites several examples of families who have chosen to have a more natural, custom ceremony conducted in their own home.

Some people with whom I spoke said they would like this type of treatment when they died but they didn’t think it was legal.  In fact, in all but nine states, it is definitely legal.  Massachusetts even offers clear instructions for home funerals on its website, including what you need for a death certificate, guidance on burials and preparing the body.

If this type of funeral is of interest to you, there are many sources for information.  One is the National Home Funeral Alliance, which has about 300 members around the country.  Another source is our website, www.diesmart.com.

 

Pet cemeteries can now bury people…in NY

In 2011, the New York Division of Cemeteries ruled that human burials could not take place in pet cemeteries.  This left many people devastated because they wanted their ashes to be buried with their pets…but they couldn’t be.

According to Ed Marin, owner of the 117 year old Hartsdale Pet Cemetery in Westchester, NY, prior to the ban more than 700 people’s ashes had been interred at Hartsdale.  He said that he gets five or six requests per year for this service.

Now, New York state will once again allow animal lovers to be buried with their pets, if the cemeteries agree to two conditions:

1) They won’t charge a fee for the burial.

2) They won’t advertise human burial services.

For more information about burial options and other funeral related information, check out diesmart.com.

 

Is planning your own funeral a good idea?

You may not know when you’re going to die, but you know for sure it will happen.

A little advance planning of your own funeral — or that of a loved one — can make that traumatic time when you die a little easier on your loved ones.

Pre-planning funerals is getting more common as many people prefer to decide on the details of the last celebration of their life themselves. If you decide to do this, talk to your parent or spouse or other family and friends about your funeral wishes at an appropriate time, probably not during an argument or over a holiday dinner. Tell your adult children what you’re thinking about.

Here are some things to consider:

1. Are you thinking about a standard viewing and funeral?
2. Do you have a cemetery plot?
3. Would you prefer cremation?
4. Do you have enough money to pay for big event?
5. Do you want your death notice to read like a biography or will you be satisfied with a published statement of your dates of birth and death?
6. Do you want a video or slide show to be shown during visitation hours? Or do you want a photo board to help mourners remember earlier times?
7. Do you want masses of flowers or would prefer that money be donated to a charity instead?
8. Is there something special you want at your funeral – like your grand piano or motorcycle?

All of the above comes at a cost. A funeral varies depending on the services provided. Cremations generally cost about $4,000. A burial the day after a viewing can be as much as $10,000. The cost of cemetery plots today begins at about $900, but can be several thousand dollars in a major metropolitan area. And you can spend $8,000 or more on a casket.

If you decide on cremation, your ashes can be placed in an urn and then in a mausoleum, or stored or disposed of however you wish.

Whatever you decide to do, if you preplan and let your loved ones know your wishes, you know that your last celebration of life will be the way you want it to be.

For more information about funeral planning, go to www.diesmart.com.

Plan A Funeral

Saying goodbye....

Saying goodbye....

Just when family and friends are dealing with the emotional grief associated with a death, a family member or friend will have to assume the responsibility for making tough decisions regarding the disposition of the body and planning funeral or memorial services.  The decisions are especially difficult if the death occurred unexpectedly or the subject of how to dispose of the body and where to bury the remains was never discussed with the decedent and/or the family prior to death.

However, this  stress can be reduced if your funeral is planned in advance and your wishes are put into writing and communicated to family and or friends.  That way, they will know what you want and will be able to carry out your plans rather that trying to figure out what you might have decided.

Whether you are planning a funeral in advance or the funeral is being planned after your death, you probably have a general idea about the kind of funeral to have.  This idea is probably influenced by religious and cultural practices, family traditions and cost. But like many others, all the things that would once have been included in a traditional funeral may no longer be wanted; preference might be to have a celebration of life rather than a mourning of death.  Perhaps the choice  might be for  a ceremony that is personalized and unique to the person being honored.  There might be an unlimited budget for the funeral or most of the assets may be left to family, friends or charities leaving very little to spend on someone’s last big event.

Regardless of the ideas you have, there are several things that should be considered.  The links below will help you to think through these things and will help you to make the necessary decisions.